Memories

Ha Ha. I skipped Tuesday. You want to know why? Most of the day I didn't have internet.  Yeah... that's sad. (Ok. Here's an example of my CDO (OCD alphabetized). I just had to go back into the post to capitalize the "m" in most... sad huh?)  Ok. So I promised that the next time I posted it would include pictures. And sorry Kathryn you already saw these on Facebook. lol I'll post some different ones too.

My old roomies. I'm gonna miss them.

This was at Kathryn (aka Kate ha ha Tikla) and Dani's birthday. Dani posed for this picture for like five minutes before she realized Tikla was recording. So then they just decided to take the picture.

Us at the dinner. I think this was the dessert part.

 Me and Kathryn after we ran through the sprinklers.

Tikla, me and Kathryn after we ran through the sprinklers. We had to practically drag Tikla. Sheesh. My glasses look funny.

I lied about some of these being on Facebook. I decided to put up different pictures. I'm going to stop messing with things before I underline everything and make it blue. lol. I had a lot of fun with these girls. It makes me sad that's it's over and when I go back in a month it won't be there anymore. But at least I have the chance to meet new roommates. And who knows maybe we'll have just as much or more. Anyhow, I'm getting anxious to get back. I want to start being productive again. I miss having things to do. Ha ha. Guess what! Today Hannah, Monie, and I went to Walmart... twice... for FUN! Ha ha. Told you... I wasn't kidding. Anyhow, to whoever reads this... I hope you are having an awesome summer, and maybe I'll see you soon, or maybe I'll see you in fall. Either way it'll probably be a blast.  

I freaking hate (not freaking a) coming up with titles!

I'm posting like a maniac. I hardly ever got on my blog when I was at BYU. Anyway, I never realized how nice it is to be logged in to everything all the time. I get on Facebook, gmail, blogger, and other such places and I'm already signed in! It's an amazing feeling, but I'm sad that I'm not sharing my computer with the most amazing person alive anymore... take it!

So this morning was the YW garage sale, and it was sooooo fun. (Yeah I still intend to go to YW activities and no one can stop me.) I also found out that I can go to camp. It's the week after Hannah's wedding so I can go as a leader if they still want me. Then pretty much right after I will probably be heading back to BYU.

But anyways, ADD much. So the YW had a garage sale and I got to see Sarah, Rachel, Beth, Hannah, Heather, and meet a couple new YW. It was such a blast. Apparently Sarah wants to come to BYU and major in psychology and so we had a lot to talk about. She is so awesome. She, Hannah, and I got into a conversation about Austism, Skizophenia, and other mental illnesses. It was pretty entertaining. I can't wait for a couple years when Sarah's at BYU. She wants me to go to Orchestra on Tuesday, so I might do that. Apparently they are having a hard time with the viola section ever since Nick and I left... ha ha. Rachel is doing great... I missed my little sister. I forgot how much fun it was being with the younger girls. We tried on all the things that didn't get sold. I have some pictures, but I have yet to figure out how to get pictures off of my phone. I got a lot of free things... Tikla would've been proud. lol. Sadly I even looked at a dress that didn't get sold and thought, "This would make great fabric." Don't worry I stopped myself.

It was a lot of fun, and now I have to leave in an hour to go see West Side Story with some of the youth. That'll probably be fun too. Oh, and PS I can't wait for all the older girls to get over the drama. It's nice to have fun for the little time I might actually be here.

PPS I'll try to post some pictures so you don't have to read so much.

Weird

So today was much better, and I assume that I was just tired. I hung out with Hannah and we even went to see Monie. I applied for a couple jobs today. Boring! I have been enjoying Youtube though. I'm pretty excited that that isn't blocked anymore. AND... FACEBOOK HAS CHAT! Sorry, I'm probably a little too excited about that. Anyways, I've been impatiently waiting for Katryn (yes I spelled it like that on purpose) to get on. I swear... when I was there she was like obsessed with Facebook, and now that she has no classes or finals, she's never on. lol That's ok though. I've been on for three hours talking to Hannah. Sad eh?

Oh, so here's the weird part. I think I'm heading back to BYU at the end of June. I wanted to take Anthro Independent Study, but I just found out that it would cost just as much to take it over summer term. Plus Utah jobs pay more so I could take that class in the morning, and then work the rest of the time. I'm pretty excited. Plus, I love being at home, but I really love being at BYU. I miss Sedalia and everything that comes with it, but I think I'm moving on with my life. Sedalia will always be the place I want to visit, and maybe sometime in my life I would move back, but right now I think I'm enjoying adulthood. Just this morning I went through the "Do you have your phone?" "What about your license?" "You can't leave until you get it." "Now when you drive the car don't put the peddle to the floor. Let it slowly work it's way to going faster." ANNOYING! I miss doing and being what ever I freaking want. Grrrr. Anyways, point being... I really like my independence. Not that being an only child isn't great I'm just SICK of all the attention. I feel so bad for Tikla because I realize that that is kind of what I did to her. My apologies dear friend. You totally should have said something! lol. Anyway, I'm kind of tired of the "Are you hungry? Are you ok? You're always in your room. Are you mad?" No I'm just tired of answering questions.

Oh, dear. I think I'm done venting now. Don't get me wrong... I love my family. They just smother me is all. Anyways, toodles! (I had to... just once for old time's sake lol).

The Beginning of my Awesome Summer

Ok. So I guess I’m not really blogging right now seeing as it’s kind of difficult to get on the internet when you are about 30,000 feet above sea level. Copy/paste works too. Today has been a VERY long day. So I failed nearly everything I was supposed to do for cleaning checks (on top of having to leave my awesome roomies). Then I finally get to the airport and both of my bags were about 15 pounds overweight. I kind of assumed they would be since Tikla had to sit on them to help me shut them lol. Then I had a little trouble getting through security because I forgot to take something out of my carry-on and so we had to go through that all over again. Then I almost missed my plane. And by almost I mean everyone was on board, the doors were locked, they gave my seat to someone else, and they actually used the words “It’s too late.” Yeah, scary. They kicked the guy out of my seat which unfortunately was the middle seat in the very last row. I mean dead last. Do you know what that means. Picture this… I have my HUGE backpack, an extra bag, and my viola… really tiny aisles and everyone is already seated. Plus there’s this tour group for old people, so like over half the plane consisted of old people. So yeah, I smacked at LEAST 12 people with something I was carrying. UGH. So now I’m pretty excited to be switching flights in Denver so I can get away from the fire from their eyes, but guess what! All of the old people are apparently going to Kansas City! How exciting. So now I don’t get to escape the death glares. Luckily I must not have smacked the people I’m sitting next to in the face because they are very nice, and I haven’t had a single glare. We are beginning our descent into Kansas City, so I will continue the beginning of my awesome summer later… stay tuned to see how many lightning bolts I get struck by today…puh.


Add a few hours to that post. I'm home now. Kinda. I've been thinking about it, and I think I'm starting to get a new home. I never thought it possible but I think BYU is becoming more of a home to me. Maybe I'm just tired, but I really miss being with Tikla and Kathryn and it hasn't even been a day yet. I went to Heather's house after I got home (right after I got home which probably didn't help) and I never realized how fake I am with my own friends. I am really tired because I only got like 3 hours of sleep (if that) and Heather wanted me to come over. If I had been with my friends from BYU then I could have just said I'm really tired maybe tomorrow, but I couldn't. Anyway, I can't wait for June!!! I get to visit Utah again. I'm totally exhausted so I'm going to bed. Good night.

The End...

Wow. April 2nd was the last time I posted and it seems like it should still be February. This is hard. A lot harder than I anticipated it would. All year long I have been complaining about wanting to go home, and now I am. I'm not exactly sure how I feel about that. I'm completely excited to be with my friends again. I want to see Frau and Smith-Cotton. The other night I fell asleep in the shower and I dreamed that I was at Bothwell Lodge. Sad eh? 

Leaving has become a lot harder than I thought it would be though. I wish that I could go home and then when I came back everything would be the same. Everyone here has someone to be with next semester. Everyone else made friends. I know that I will still be friends with Tikla and Kathryn, but I also know that it won't be anything like it was this year. They are probably going to be best friends with their new roommates. They actually know their new roommates. I don't even know if I have roommates. Ugh. Everyone has someone now that I think of it. Tikla has Jessica, Kathryn has Breeanne (spelling?, uh... who cares), Christine has Dani, and Kate has Camille. I guess I'm still having some difficulty seeing this as "I just didn't want to live with you." instead of "I just don't want you in my life." Because to me it seems like no one cares as much as I do that this is our last week as roommates in 142 M. Smith Hall. We don't even have a picture of all of us, so as of next Thursday it will be as if nothing happened.

Ending things is hard. I wish I had prepared myself a little better than I have. I have been ignoring this for a while, and now I think I'm having a break down. If not now then soon. I've got pretty much everything I own in boxes right now. Boxes that scream "You are never coming back, and nothing will ever be the same." Everyone is so excited for summer, and I guess I am too, I just know that someday I will have to come back and end up being really lonely.

Ok. I think I'm done being emo about this. The next time I post I will probably be back at home. Bored to death. Wow, I'm zoning out a lot right now. It looks like it's going to storm a lot. I hope it's huge. I need something to zone out to. When I go home we'll be in tornado season, so I hope I don't miss all the excitement. I already missed a 5.0 earthquake. Ok, so that wasn't really in Sedalia, but it was about 3 hours away. I shouldn't be this into natural disasters. 

I should probably do something productive now. I have plenty of things to do

Year one at BYU...the end.

French Choir Concert

Kathryn talked me into being in the French Choir. This was the hardest
song we had to sing (J'entends le Moulin), so that's why there are
moments where it's sounds a little... problematic. I was pretty happy
though. It was fun over all.

Who I Have Become

Ok so I was thinking about myself recently (conceited right?), but no, I was thinking about all the things that have changed about me since I came to BYU. Sadly, I have been noticing all of the bad things and I forgot that maybe some good things changed too. I found this personality test that I had taken last summer that I thought really did nail me, so I decided to take it again to see what changed.

This is who I was:
You are a Leader

Your solid grounding in the practicalities of life, along with your self-assuredness and your willingness to appreciate new things make you a LEADER.

You're in touch with what is going on around you and adept at remaining down-to-earth and logical.

Although you're detail-oriented, this doesn't mean that you lose the big picture.

You tend to find beauty in form and efficiency, as opposed to finding it in broad-based, abstract concepts.

Never one to pass on an adventure, you're consistently seeking and finding new things, even in your immediate surroundings.

Because of this eagerness to pursue new experiences, you've learned a lot; your attention to detail means that you gain a great deal from your adventures.

The intellectual curiosity that drives you leads you to seek out causes of and reasons behind things.

Your confidence gives you the potential to take your general awareness and channel it into leadership.

You're not set on one way of doing things, and you often have the skills and persistence to find innovative ways of facing challenges.

You are well-attuned to your talents, and can deal with most problems that you face.

Never one to be found in chic boutiques or trendy clothing stores, you take an extremely practical approach to getting dressed.

Generally, you believe that you control your life, and that external forces only play a limited role in determining what happens to you.

You are Generous:

Your awareness of those around you, along with your nuanced perceptions of the world at large, makes you the GENEROUS person that you are.

You value time to yourself and understand how rich your private world can be—you know that you don't have to go wild to have a good time.

You are excited and energized by ideas and often enjoy things more through observation than through experience.

This tendency gives you an appreciation for different perspectives and opinions about the world.

Being as aware of others as you are doesn't mean you find it easy to trust them immediately—this is something that happens more slowly for you.

Despite this, you are aware of the complexities of many situations and are reluctant to pass judgments on others.

Although you have fewer friendships than some people, those that you have are meaningful and are important to you.

You value spending time alone—it is while reflecting on the world around you that you often learn something new about yourself or begin to understand something that's been bothering you.

This is who I am now:
You are an Inventor

Your imagination, self-reliance, openness to new things, and appreciation for utility combine to make you an INVENTOR.

You have the confidence to make your visions into reality, and you are willing to consider many alternatives to get that done.

The full spectrum of possibilities in the world intrigues you—you're not limited by pre-conceived notions of how things should be.

Problem-solving is a specialty of yours, owing to your persistence, curiosity, and understanding of how things work.

Your vision allows you to identify what's missing from a given situation, and your creativity allows you to fill in the gaps.

Your awareness of how things function gives you the ability to come up with new uses for common objects.

It is more interesting for you to pursue excitement than it is to get caught up in a routine.

Although understanding details is not difficult for you, you specialize in seeing the bigger picture and don't get caught up in specifics.

You tend to more proactive than reactive—you don't just wait for things to come to you.

You're not afraid to let your emotions guide you, and you're generally considerate of others' feelings as well.

You tend to do things on the spur of the moment, not sticking to a set schedule.

You do your own thing when it comes to clothing, guided more by practical concerns than by other people's notions of style.

Generally, you believe that you control your life, and that external forces only play a limited role in determining what happens to you.

You are Benevolent

You are a great person to interact with—understanding, giving, and trusting—in a word, BENEVOLENT

You don't mind being in social situations, as you feel comfortable enough with people to be yourself.

Your caring nature goes beyond a basic concern: you take the time to understand the nuances of people's situations before passing any sort of judgment.

You're a good listener, and even better at offering advice.

You're concerned with others at both an individual and societal level—you sympathize with the plights of troubled groups, and you can care about people you've never met.

Considering many different perspectives is something at which you excel, and you appreciate that quality in others.

Other people's feelings are important to you, and you're good at mediating disputes.

Because of your understanding and patience, you tend to bring out the best in people.

This test also gives me numbers for the different areas of my personality. I noticed what I always knew, my confidence went from Very High to Average and Slightly Low. But I've gained so much. While I still think practically I also daydream and let myself be creative, and look at the beauty of something instead of just it's purpose. Also, my most important, I went from having Very Low Trust to Very High Trust. That's a huge leap for me. I don't usually trust people's motives or what they say, but this year I have learned that there are wonderful people in my life now, that I can trust that they love me, and that they don't need a reason. I'm sorry it took eight months for me to figure it out, especially since I hurt them a lot. I hope that someday I will be able to make it up to them. Only time will tell.

April Fool's Day

Kathryn's crazy makeup. All the makeup was done by Tikla.

Tikla's makeup.

Tikla with her mouth closed. lol

I look like someone beat me up and now I'm really sad about it.

This picture has been giving me so much crap today. For some reason no matter how many times you flip it, it doesn't stay flipped.

Ok. I got fooled a few times today. Didn't do much fooling though. The day's not over yet though. This morning my mom told me that she couldn't afford my plane ticket home, and that I would have to cover it myself. Of course I have loads of money right? I soon said, "Wait it's April Fool's Day. Your kidding aren't you?" Then, Kate (I know it was Kate) made an April Fish post it note, and then had Kathryn put it on my back. I didn't know until Monie told me. But I will have to admit the best one was when Tikla called me and started with, "Ok, so I promised to tell you first..." Well the only thing I said she had to tell me first was when she got her first kiss, so I basically freaked out. Then I did the same thing to her. I said, "Wait it's April Fool's day!" And then she said, "Oh shoot it is isn't it?" In a way where it was like "now no one is going to believe me. Then she said, "I'm at the back door. Come let me in." So I went back there and she had ICECREAM. Everytime we have a first kiss with a boy we owe everyone in the apartment icecream. So yet again I freaked out until she finally said April Fool's. I think she's the only one who really got me most of the way through.

Then tonight we had a special dinner. It's Tikla's tradition to wear clothes backwards and have crazy hair, and now she added crazy makeup too. Then we have a spaghetti dinner where everyone ate with their faces. That's what the wierd pictures above are. It was a lot of fun.

Loathing

Tikla and I sang "What is this Feeling?" from Wicked at our ward talent show yesterday. I'll have to say that I'm not completely disappointed in my performance. Surprisingly. It was a lot of fun. So yeah this is the video from that.