I'm getting a little impatient. March 25, 2009. 256 days away. That seems like a lot but he's been gone for a year and 5 months now, so yeah I'm getting a little impatient. What's worse is he may get home on March 25, 2009, but I'll be here in Utah, and he's going home to Missouri. And what if I go to Seattle for the summer? And what if he doesn't go to LDSBC? I have no clue when I'll actually get to see him. And honestly I really miss him. So far he's the only person I've been able to count on. We've had our ups and downs true, and there have been times when he's treated me really badly. I mean the year before his mission we didn't really talk to each other at all. Up until about a month before his mission that is. But for some strange reason no matter what was going on with us I knew I could go to him and he would drop almost anything to come help me. Weird huh?
I think it also helps that he knows me better than anyone on the planet. Including my own family. He notices everything. He can order for me at almost any restaurant. He knows how I eat square and round sandwiches and hot pizza. He knows my favorite color and movie. He even knows what my insecurities are. He's used that one against me. If he would have been around last year he would have seen my situation and without me having to say anything he would have just known how I was feeling. I was listening to this song called "Soulmate" and it says that we are all looking for someone who knows how to love us. Justin does. Freakishly well. I think it helped that he got to witness others mistakes as well. He was there for me for my whole relationship with Samuel, and he, unlike Samuel, go to hear my thoughts and feelings. He knows what bothers me now. He did before too. He knew exactly how to push my buttons when he wanted to. See most the people in my life now accidently hurt my feelings or annoy me. Half the time they don't realize it. He knows and does it on purpose, the little punk.
But after all that, I still really miss him. I miss not having to explain myself. Or try to figure myself out because he always understood. It's good that I understand why I feel weird things at random times, but I miss having someone I can go up to with a smile on my face and he asks me what's wrong. No one knows me that well. I'm getting really impatient.
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